Real Life?

I'm sitting here listening to coyotes howl outside my window and wondering if this is real life. There are CAH-YO-TEES howling outside my window! I'm avoiding sleep and other such silly notions, and once again, I am blown away by the realization that this is not where I expected to be (SC) or what I expected to be doing (What AM I doing?). Welcome to the life of an obsessive planner.

The other day I wondered how 12-year-old Abby would respond if she saw me. Having just finished reading Mother Theresa's biography - I think she would be very disappointed to discover I was not caring for sick people in the slums of India. Actually I think she'd be surprised I was still alive - considering I was convinced I would be a martyr for my faith by age 19. Reading Jesus Freaks at a young age will do that for you.

But alas dear innocent 12-year-old self, I am instead listening to coyotes howl outside my window and wondering what 35-year-old Abby will be doing. If history is to be any sort of guide, I will obviously NOT be doing anything I expect to be. But as it turns out - I don't think that's such a bad thing.

Good Lord. May I be ever content in my circumstances but ever longing for your eternal glory.